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The charge—Seeking the approval of others. I can say personally, I am GUILTY as charged. Growing up, I constantly sought the approval of other people. My confidence was solely based on what others thought of me. And as you can imagine, that meant my confidence level was very low. I had to ask myself why? Why didn’t I love me? Looking back, I realized the moment my confidence level began to rise. It was when I exchanged looking from the left and right and started looking up. I had to first re-define how I saw myself. How did I do this? By going to the word of the Father and realizing what he had to say about me. Sis, ONLY He can define you. Only he can truly say who we are and what we will become, he created you! Take a look at Jeremiah 29:11 which says “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Who better to turn to than the Creator? He molded and shaped us exactly how he wanted us to be!
Knowing this, how can we let other people get into our ears and spew lies? How can anyone define you? You are amazing just the way you are! You are made in his image. If I’m being real, whenever I heard this, I would roll my eyes. And I am sure you have heard this over and over but it truly works when you take this to heart. We MUST really believe it and speak it over ourselves. When you honestly believe those words, you will walk and talk differently. Just in case you were wondering, you cannot and will not ever FULLY please people. There will always be someone who has something to say, both negative and positive. The choice lies with us. We have to make a personal decision to either accept or reject what others say. We can either take those words to heart and accept them or brush them off and remember what God’s word says. Isaiah 22:2 says it best, “Don’t put your trust in mere humans. They are as frail as breath. What good are they?”
Human beings are fickle. They love you and maybe even like you one minute and hate you and talking about you in the next moment. My youth pastor once said, “They talked about Jesus, a perfect man so don’t you think they’re gonna talk about you?” Somebody will always have something to say. It would be exhausting if we relied solely on human opinion and approval for our happiness. We would NEVER be contentment with our lives. Nothing would ever be good enough and there would be no satisfaction. We would always crave more so when would we ever be satisfied? Instead, we have to rest in God’s words and his promises. You may be rolling your eyes but it has been the real deal for me. If you have to, do like I had to do and write a few scriptures on self-esteem and tape it to the mirror. Look at those words and read it EVERY single day until it is engrained. You will begin to walk with your head higher and some swag in your step. We must have comfort in that we only have to live for an audience of one.
Sometimes, we try to live for others by fishing for likes and positive feedback on social media. I have to watch that myself. But here is only ONE person we have to please, our Father in Heaven. Isn’t that a relief? For me, it gets exhausting trying to make everybody happy. It just can’t happen because someone will always have that “stank face.” Sis, here’s a little secret. If you please God, everyone else’s wants and desires will fall in line. If our focus is on NOT disappointing God, then we would never have to worry about what family, friends, or even strangers think. It’s okay to have your inner circle weigh in on decisions but don’t let it be the final say.
Sometimes, living for God will disappoint others but at the end of the day, you will ONLY answer to God. No one else. Remember that. Anyone that you have to compromise your values to please is NOT worth it. I can think of no one worth compromising my walk or blocking my blessings. NO ONE. So next time you are in the midst of unsolicited opinions—Think, who am I trying to please? Is it an audience of many or an audience of ONE?
